green hair don't care

Dress (remixed 1, 2, 3, 4): Modcloth, Sweater (shop!): Gap

This past October, I created a to-do list for my 26th year of life. It's filled with silly and serious dreams and goals, and one of them was to dye the ends of my hair purple. Because why not?

I dyed my hair tips red last year, and after it inevitably began to fade to a golden blonde I began to think about other fun colors I'd like to eventually try. Purple won out in the end. I loved the dark purple, but after a few weeks, it began to turn into this strange, mermaid-inspired teal green. I'm not gonna lie, I wasn't bothered by it. I was totally fine with the seaweed locks, and even found a kindred spirit (Elizabeth over at Delightfully Tacky) with teal hair in the blogosphere. 

A week or two ago, though, I had a friend tell me that she really didn't like it. That it was probably time for it to go. It kind of took me back a little bit, because I somehow still manage to be surprised when people don't think the things I like are as awesome as I think they are (like my gold-capped molar, like my autographed Orlando Bloom headshot, like the Renaissance Festival...). Maybe I'm just super weird in a million different ways. But I reacted differently to the criticism this time around. I didn't shy back or try to people please or become embarrassed that something I like might be weird or nerdy or whatever else. I just said, "Oh, I like it!" and the conversation moved on. 

It wasn't a particularly life-changing moment, but it did cause me to think a little bit. Why do I make the choices that I do, in style and otherwise? Who are they for? Because if they're for me, then I can proudly wear that green hair don't care vibe and be unashamed by my loud galaxy-print dress and my gold molar and my handcrafted dragon statue made by a woman dressed like an apothecary's wife. I've been told by many various people over the course of my life that I am weird. That I'm nerdy, or "homeschooled". I have never been able to figure out the reasons for saying those things in a hurtful way, especially when the words are spoken by friends. What are they hoping to gain? My embarrassment, an apology, a change of personality? Who knows. 

I think it's really hard to be confident. I often find myself feeling out a group before voicing my opinions. Sometimes I even nod in agreement or change my answer based on the dialogue of others. Not about big things, of course, like God or Harry Potter. But the little things often slip away, out of cowardice and self doubt. I know I'm not the only one who does this, but it often leaves me feeling really frustrated with myself. Sometimes I'll blurt out the truth to my husband after we've been hanging out with friends, because it has been proven over the course of our relationship that he will love me in all things, to the bizarrest degree. I wish I could feel that strong all the time. 

I chopped my hair off this week, and the whole evening I was trying to decide why I was doing it. Was it because I had already been thinking about it, because my hair was dry and brittle from the dye? Or was it because of that friend's comment? I'm not sure. Either way, I love the new haircut and it feels much happier and healthier. And perhaps it's the first step toward that dream of a pixie cut. 

At the end of the day, I want what I do to be for me. Not in a selfish way, but in an intentional way. I wear the clothes that I do because I love the way I feel in them, and I love the creativity inherent in putting together unique combinations and in utilizing my clothes in new and unexpected ways. They're small but freeing choices that I'm proud of. I don't think there's any one secret to not caring what other people think - I think I'll always care. But I also think that I can practice confidence and claim joy. Those are worthy pursuits. So is Renaissance Festival pizza. Everyone else is just missing out. 

happy halloween {frocktober, day 28+29+30}

Outfit 1: Dress (remixed 1 / 2 / 3): Modcloth, Lace Top: LOFT

Outfit 2: Dress: gifted, Denim (remixed 1 / 2): Old Navy

Outfit 3: Dress (shop!): Sheinside

A collection of Frocktober days to prepare for the very last!
I just purchased the third dress from an online shop called Sheinside! I ordered some fun things for my birthday, and just received them this week. The clothes are inexpensive and super cute, but they also ship from China and are sometimes not very well represented in the shop photos, details and reviews. It's kind of a gamble! I went ahead and just went for it, hoping the clothes fit! This dress pattern is incredibly vibrant and fun (see it online here), and it actually has 3-quarter length sleeves. It's really comfortable, too. My only qualm with it is that the waist seam is very oddly placed. I'm hoping to wear it again soon and get better photos of it, but the actual seam is about 2 inches below where I belted it. It's not low enough to be intentionally drop-waisted, so it creates a rather strange poof unless you belt it. But all in all I'm excited about playing around with it!

It's Halloween, which means that today is my last day of intentional dress-wearing.
I will be celebrating by wearing another dress to a wedding tomorrow!

I love Halloween. It doesn't make a whole lot of sense to love Halloween as an adult, because most of the fun is either of the over-the-top horror variety or from trying to be a kid again by going trick-or-treating, which you always regret because 1.) you look creepy amongst the neighborhood children 2.) all that candy just ends up making your adult body sick and unhappy.

But I actually love Halloween for very real, appropriate reasons.

1. Harry Potter

All Hogwarts holidays are fantastic, but there's something incredibly cheerful, festive, and magical about Hogwarts Halloweens. It's probably second only to a Hogwarts Christmas. They're legitimate witches and wizards, so they obviously have every right and reason to have floating candles, elaborate feasts, black garments, witch hats, and obviously copious amounts of butterbeer and pumpkin juice. When you're in the world of Harry Potter, the holiday ceases to have that foreboding, silly, American style of cheesy Halloweeniness.

2. Dressing up

I still love costumes. I love dressing up with my husband at a harvest festival, working a booth or a trunk for trunk-or-treat. The last two years we have been Disney couples (Carl and Ellie, and Gnomeo and Juliet) and it has been so fun. I'm a big fan of make believe and stories, and having a day where you can be silly and dress up is totally okay with me.
I'm currently wearing a black and white striped sweater, a black beanie, a black mask, and a tote bag filled with books...any guesses? :)

3. Carving pumpkins

I've accidentally carved cat-themed pumpkins for the last two years in a row, which means it should probably just be a solid tradition at this point. We had our pumpkin carving get-together with friends last night, and we deviated a bit from cats and carved ours into Pikachu. Close enough!

4. It's finally Fall

This wasn't true when we lived in Virginia, but I have definite memories as a kid of growing up in Arizona and feeling like Halloween was the first experience with a lovely, chilly fall evening each year. We would be walking around outside with our candy buckets and it would finally be in the upper 60's or 70's, and it would feel so grand. Sometimes we'd even be shivering (we're pretty wimpy about the cold out here). It would usher in November and all of the holiday dreams and festivities, and Arizona would finally begin to cool down!


I'll even confess to enjoying a few scary movies here and there, and liking some of the creepiness that always accompanies Halloween time. I'm the kid that loved weird dark movies like The Labyrinth, The Neverending Story, Little Nemo: Adventures in Slumberland, etc.

But mostly I just enjoy friends and the simple festivities of October's end.

too many stories {frocktober, day 1}

Dress: Modcloth (remixed 1 // 2)

Frocktober has begun! 

I wanted to start out this brand new Frocktober with a dress that I've already blogged before. This is a new remix for this galaxy-print dress. It's one of my favorites! It's probably the softest, most comfortable dress I own. I've worn it plain, with tights and boots, and I've also worn it with a striped sweater on top. This outfit showcases a third way to wear it, tucked into a neutral skirt and swept into a cardigan. 

This dress has a very bold, unique print but that doesn't mean it's impossible to wear! I think sometimes those fun "statement pieces" we buy end up sitting in our closet for years without much wear. Get creative and find ways to incorporate those pieces into your wardrobe more regularly. See what you can come up with!

Speaking of galaxy, this dress always reminds me of some of my favorite space stories -- Star Wars, Battlestar Galactica (don't look at me like that), Guardians of the Galaxy. 

One of my favorite things about Fall is the arrival of new TV shows. I love watching TV and keeping up with characters and stories. The problem is, it's almost impossible to actually stay caught up. My husband and I have an enormous pile of TV shows that we're either in the middle of, just starting, or hoping to start. It's quite overwhelming. I obviously don't want to spend my entire life bogged down with TV, but it is something we enjoy doing together.

How do you decide which shows to really commit to, and which ones to let fall by the wayside? 

We have started/are in the middle of/are currently watching: 

Community, Gotham, Sleepy Hollow, New Girl, The Mindy Project, A to Z, Reign, The Vampire Diaries, Walking Dead, Will and Grace, Playing House, Bones, House of Cards, Parenthood.

Now that I've typed all of that out, I'm feeling pretty disturbed. That doesn't even count our wishlist of shows, which includes shows like Arrested Development, Parks and Rec, Chuck, Fringe, Scandal, Freaks and Geeks, Suits, and Alias.

Before you start sending me all of those "technology-is-evil" videos about looking up and living life and throwing our TV out the window, we don't actually spend all of our time watching TV. We actually haven't watched any TV at all this entire week, which is really the problem. We started watching Gotham and are already 2 episodes behind. We've been trying to finish Will and Grace for almost 4 years. There are a lot of shows we want to watch, but I think the real skill comes with knowing when to say, this is never going to happen. We need to try to be wise and figure out the shows that are actually our priority. We've gotta cut some of these loose, especially the ones that require weekly viewing. They'll either be phenomenal and we'll watch them leisurely online in 10 years, or they'll end up crappy and we'll be glad we didn't waste our time (ahem, looking at you, himym). 

How do you choose which shows to watch? What're your current faves?

Also, there's a cat in this picture. Sneaky.

catching up

Dress (remix)(shop!): Modcloth

Today is the very last day of Frocktober! (in other words, happy halloween!)

I will be posting the last few outfits in the next few days.
My halloween-themed post will be up later this afternoon, though! Can you guess what my husband and I dressed up as?
Last year our church's harvest festival and trunk or treat was actually on Halloween, and we dressed up as Carl and Ellie from UP, and it was so much fun. Obviously my costume must incorporate a dress... so we decided to stay in the cartoon genre. We chose one of my favorites! Mostly because of the great voice work, and the fun soundtrack, featuring mostly Elton John songs... have you guessed it yet?

space cadet

I'm gonna try not to completely overdo this, but this is the best dress I've ever owned.

Alright. Now that I've overdone it, I'll go ahead and tell you why.
Somewhere along the way, I became enamored with stars. Probably a very common trait of any adolescent girl, but I'm also sure it had something to do with the incredible night sky at my parent's house in Arizona. Growing  up being very familiar with the big dipper and all its friends was something I adored, and grew to understood the immense beauty of.

When I was 12, one of my best friend's moved away. I remember her plopping down in the grass and looking up at the night sky, saying, "Promise me you'll lie down and look at the stars every chance you get. Promise me you won't ever take this for granted."

Now that we live in Virginia, I know how she felt! Where we live the stars are near impossible to see, except on the clearest of nights. And even then, the lights are usually too bright throughout the city. 

I miss seeing them, and always having them easily seen overhead.

Some things are easily taken for granted, until you no longer have them -- but now, every time I go back to Arizona, I take that time to plop down in the grass and look up at the stars. I keep that promise. 

Dress (shop!): Modcloth, Cardigan: J. Crew

The first time I saw a space/galaxy inspired print on a dress, I was immediately enamored.

I knew someday I would own one, I just wasn't sure what kind it would be. This one from modcloth was the perfect fit, and once I got it (birthday gift, thanks mom!) I knew it was love at first sight.

Other than the fact that the print is absurdly awesome, it's also the softest, silkiest, most amazingly delightful dress I've ever worn. (It also harbors thoughts of things like Star Wars, Battlestar Galactica, and other deliciously nerdy things). 

The open back, v-neck, and loose fit are some of my favorite details. I'm quite in love.

To infinity and beyond.