going broke for cat mugs

I actually cannot even try to refer to myself as "frugal" with a straight face. I am not frugal. I never have been. It has been both my burden and my pleasure to spend all of my money when and if I ever get any. Dave Ramsey would judge me. He probably knows, somehow, within his magical stern eyebrows that Caitlin Schanaker is not good at this stuff.

When it comes to spending, I think I may be straight-up delusional. I have this very naive, happy-go-lucky perspective that money will always find a way. Because as we all know, where there's a will, there's a way, and my will for shopping is fierce. It's not practical shopping, either. It's frivolous and spontaneous. It's the best kind. Because everything is a special occasion and there are always reasons to go all out. Life is all about those excuses. Weekend getaways and ordering way too much food but still getting dessert and buying the extravagantly expensive and useless trinkets at Anthropologie. I have fallen into the trap that I think many young adults fall into: trying to live the way your parents live, despite the fact that it took decades for them to get there. It's why we're all drowning in debt. It's incredibly sad, and also really fun until you have to start paying your loans back. Right out of the gate, I try to usher myself into adulthood by paying extra for guacamole and splurging at World Market and shopping online and impulse-buying rain boots when I live in Arizona and no one can afford this nonsense.

My husband and I joke often that when we don't think twice about paying the extra for guacamole, we'll know we have arrived.

All of this is being written because I have hit a wall today. It's a wall made of cat mugs. A friend sent me a link to the most beautiful cat mugs I have ever seen, and even though we have a house that is taking all of our time and money and a baby coming out of me this year, I want the mugs. All of them. I want to pay the $60 (plus shipping) for a set of cat mugs.

This is my Friday confession. I sat there staring at these beautiful mugs, cursing Anthropologie, trying to justify a way to buy them. I could just buy one; they're $14 each. I could search online for a coupon. But then I would be missing out on the other colors, and look how nicely they look all together? How lovely would they look, purring on my coffee bar? I could bully people into buying me a housewarming gift, a baby gift (babies like mugs, right?), a super early birthday gift...I could set up a gofundme! That's what that site is for now, right? Providing a way for friends and strangers to buy you silly things you can't afford? America.

Closing out of that shopping window was hard. Not in a real-life way, but in a wow, I think I'm going insane kind of way. Obviously this post is silly and this "problem" isn't a problem at all, but the fact remains that I feel stressed and restless over cat mugs. Over not being able to travel anymore. Over all of the things we still have to buy and fix up on the house. Over feeling like we'll never be in that settled, give-me-all-the-guac place in our lives. I have to try to be frugal, to be smart, to be less selfish and less spoiled and more responsible and more everything.

As much as I like to pretend that I'm not that girl going broke for cat mugs, I totally am. I am her and she is me. I just have to calm her down a little bit.

living in sunshine

Top (on ebay): Anthropologie, Skirt (remixed): LOFT, 
Earrings (remixed): Ruche, Booties: Urbanog, Ring (similar): Ebay

It's amazing how working in a space of sunshiney natural light can quite literally illuminate you.
Your soul, your well-being, your general happiness.
It seems like a small thing, but there's a certain power to the sun that gives me a whole new respect for like...coal miners. And Alaskans. And subway workers. And sunshine-less people, like me, up until last month.

My office used to be a windowless closet that sapped me of my energy and it was such a huge surprise to me when I moved into the new building and sat staring out my window for hours, feeling like -- I'm alive. 
I felt a renewed sense of self, like I could do anything, go anywhere. I felt productive and excited.
There's a new heartbeat to this building, and I can feel it!
There are terraces and windows galore, so much light and activity and newness.

It has been really easy for me to get used to, but I will try my best not to take it for granted. 

It makes me realize what a difference joy can make in the midst of the daily grind. Having pride in your work and feeling like you're a part of something special.

Where do you find your joy? 

It's a conscious effort, but it shouldn't be easily shaken. I hope I'm always able to find joy in my work, whatever it may be. Whether it's becoming an author like I sometimes (always) dream about, or working at a cafe. 

All I know right now is that I hope there's sunshine there.

holiday trends

I've already talked a little bit about the velvet trend, but there have been a few other things I've seen around that I'm either excited to try or still not quite sure about. Maybe a mixture of both!

To start out, what do you think about coated pants?

Anthropologie

J. Crew

Nordstrom

Ruche

Anthropologie

Anthropologie

Ruche

A lot of times, I absolutely love the look -- it has that leathery sheen, but has the fit of your favorite jeans.
I'm still unsure how they'll look in-person, but I went ahead and took the plunge and bought the last pair in that list above.
Ruche has Wednesday Style Steals, and this week's happened to include the coated pants. I couldn't resist.
I had been intrigued since I first saw them in their lookbook, and fell in love with this ensemble:

I think in general the trends seem to be leaning toward the edgier looks. A lot of leather and leather-ish ideas.
I honestly have zero authority on the subject, because I don't follow high fashion or the actual style trends happening around the world -- I just know what I see in my favorite stores, and the things that are totally new to my wardrobe (or are making a vicious comeback, like velvet.)

Speaking of leather, let's take a look at how bold it's getting.
What do you think about leather-centered outfits?

Via Ruche

Ladylike Leather

Leather obviously isn't new to the fashion world. Leather bags, wallets, shoes, jewelry, and of course jackets...those have long been staples in the female psyche.
But leather seems to be getting friskier by the minute. Striped dresses with gold leather pockets, laser-cut leather blouses, pleated leather skirts. This is serious stuff.

I'm most intrigued by the leather skirts, and subtle leather accents.
Some of my favorites:

Ruche

Ruche

Ruche

Would you wear such bold (yet ladylike) leather pieces?
I have yet to try them out, but I do love the look of a great burgundy leather skirt. (I also like this quilted mini skirt!).
I'll report back with my findings on the coated jeans as soon as they arrive!
In the meantime, what are some winter trends you're a bit curious about?

the tapestry bag

The tale of this tapestry bag probably begins a long time ago, way back when I first saw Anne of Green Gables. My desire for one has only increased over the years, and when I finally got around to reading Anne of Green Gables, it was settled.

Matthew, however, was spared the ordeal of speaking first, for as soon as she concluded that he was coming to her she stood up, grasping with one thin brown hand the handle of a shabby, old-fashioned carpet-bag; the other she held out to him....

"Oh, I can carry it," the child responded cheerfully. "It isn't heavy. I've got all my worldly goods in it, but it isn't heavy. And if it isn't carried in just a certain way the handle pulls out--so I'd better keep it because I know the exact knack of it. It's an extremely old carpet-bag. 

Sweater (shop!)/Tapestry Bag (sold out): Ruche, Bottoms: Thrifted, Necklace: Anthropologie, Shoes: Urbanog, 

Of course, this particular bag isn't extremely old and doesn't contain all of my worldly goods in it. But it certainly could, and the dreamer in me just has to close her eyes and grasp the handles to imagine the life-changing adventure that is about to occur -- just my tapestry bag and me.

There's something about having this tapestry bag that makes me feel really grown up.

I packed it up for our Thanksgiving weekend with friends, and I loved feeling put together for once. We've always survived on mismatched and hand me down suitcases, which have always done the trick just fine. Dusty and I have a random stack of bags under our bed, and we usually just cram everything into one bag whenever we travel.

But having something cute and folksy that's all mine is kind of lovely all on its own. A bag just for weekends, those special short trips reserved for close-by mini adventures or holiday getaways. 

This sweater is also one of my favorite new things from Ruche, and I have already worn it a little too often lately. The bows and pearls are so sweet! 

I guess I was feeling a little retro yesterday because I parted my hair down the middle for the first time in many years. I was overwhelmed with how much I look like my mom. I kept picturing a photo of her when she was around my age, with her long straight hair, parted down the middle and all. I couldn't ask for a more lovely look-alike, but it made me miss her something fierce.

We're basically twinsies, except for my chin and sense of humor which belong to my dad. 

I think I'll keep up the middle-part for a while longer. :)

Cara Box: all about fall

This was my second time participating in Cara Box (see the first month here!), and once again I absolutely loved it.

The theme this time was fall, so obviously I loved every bit of it!

I met Cait over at My Life as a Long (check out my guest post for her!), and I sent her a fall-inspired box last week. I also met Charity of Our Pemberley, who sent me the most adorable box ever. 

I loved chatting with these ladies over the past 6 weeks, talking about pumpkin spice and travel and marriage. Having the opportunity to connect with other women in such an encouraging way is pretty amazing. I call them my pen pals, because it is kind of nostalgic, thinking about writing notes to people you may never meet. It brings back images of gel pens and stickers and handwritten letters.

As I was opening my box, I had my husband take pictures of my authentic reactions to each item. I love opening things. A lot.

Charity is so sweet. When we first got connected, I found out that she is also a law wife! Such a crazy coincidence, but I think it ended up being a perfect match. We were able to talk about some of the blessings and struggles of law school, and I think it was really encouraging for both of us.
She put so much thought into my box. I was so thrilled with everything. I felt like she had known me for years!
The polka dotted plate and mug and the fox necklace were all from Anthropologie, one of my very favorite stores. She said when she saw the fox, she thought of me immediately. So sweet!
She handmade the crochet beanie and flower headband (which I've worn twice this week already, whoops!), which I love.
The dishtowel is adorable, with a recipe for "Easy Streusel Apple Pie" on it. She also included two nail polishes, and a sweet handwritten card.
That's one of the best requirements of this whole exchange -- a handwritten note of encouragement.
As Kaitlyn over at Wifessionals (the creator of Cara Box) says: It's great to get items that put a smile on your face, but kind words will last in your heart forever.

I'm so thankful I was able to meet these two lovely ladies! I still keep in touch with the first two women I met in this exchange, through their blogs and Instagrams. I would absolutely encourage anyone and everyone to participate, because it has been so much fun! And a definite extra blessing of blogging. (You can also participate if you don't blog, though! You'll be assigned with other non-bloggers!).
Do it. :)

in the woods

I love gifted clothes. I love the thought of picking something out specifically for someone else to wear. 

Likewise, I love when people pick out things specifically for me to wear!

Clothes and accessories, like jewelry, are somewhat personal - so when someone takes the time (or happens to have a flash of ohmygosh they would love that! while shopping), I really appreciate it and tend to treasure it. 

Occasionally I even do so if I don't even like the item that much...which probably isn't the greatest thing to do, but I can't help but be grateful and appreciative of such a sweet gift, even if it isn't necessarily my style or something I would have picked out for myself. 

That is not the case with this Anthropologie fox top, however!

I would have absolutely picked this out for myself, and I couldn't even wait to wear it until after Frocktober.
My husband's brother and sister-in-law saw it in Anthropologie and knew I would love it!
I built a dress outfit specifically around this shirt, and it happened to also include the fabulous orange tights my best friend got for me, too!

Top (shop!): Anthropologie, Dress: old/gifted, Earrings (shop on sale!): Ruche

I love the scoop/button-up back, and it comes in some really cute alternative critter-themed prints and colors!
But of course, foxes are my favorite. :)